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Magic Re-Lighting Candles
Make A Wish... And Another... And Another... Bring some magic to your next birthday celebration with our Magic Re-Lighting Candles! These unique birthday candles look like any other, until you blow them out - and then they miraculously relight, bringing the party back to...- $ 5.95
$ 8.95- $ 5.95
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Exciting Exploding Bang Wallet Gag
Bang For Your Buck Suspect someone is dipping into your hard earned cash? Would-be thieves will get what they paid for with this Exciting Exploding Bang Wallet Gag! Just load it with strip caps, wait for someone to open it, and they'll be met...- $ 9.95
$ 14.95- $ 9.95
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Bacon Scented Deluxe Air Freshener
Fill Any Space With The Sizzling Scent Of Fresh Bacon This unlikely Bacon Scented Deluxe Air Freshener is the perfect way to brighten any carnivore’s day. Put one up in the family room and everyone will have a sudden craving for a BLT. Each...- $ 5.95
$ 7.95- $ 5.95
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Bacon Scented Bacon Soap
Enticing Fried Bacon Aroma, No Greasy Residue It's a sunny Sunday morning and you wake to the sweet smell of bacon wafting from the... bathroom? That's right, Archie McPhee has captured the enticing aroma of frying bacon in a bar of Bacon Scented Bacon Soap! Meat...- $ 8.95
$ 14.95- $ 8.95
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Finger Brain
Great Minds? Finger Like They're squishy! They're rubbery! They're full of weird little ridges... maybe that's where we keep the thoughts? In any case, these soft Finger Brains are great for gifts, gags, and in some cases, anatomically accurate models that are built to...- $ 5.95
$ 5.95- $ 5.95
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Bigfoot Finger Feet
In Search Of... Your Own Hand You’ve been searching for a long time, but you’ve finally stumbled across the source of those mysterious footprints in the woods: Bigfoot Finger Feet. Bigfoot is famous for his namesake giant feet. What is your hand famous for?...- $ 5.95
$ 5.95- $ 5.95
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Emergency Underpants Dispenser
Fresh Underpants When You Need Them One pair of Emergency Underpants is great, but what if, um, you like, uh, have another emergency? Don't fret, Archie McPhee's got you partially covered with the Emergency Underpants Dispenser. Emergency Underpants For Dirty Little Secrets These 3-1/2" (8.9 cm) Emergency Underpants Dispensers...- $ 8.95
$ 16.95- $ 8.95
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Ear Guards Ear Protectors
While You're Sleeping, Spiders Are Crawling Into Your Ears And Laying Eggs It's easy to dismiss these Ear Guards Ear Protectors as a "novelty", or a "joke", or "potentially more harmful to ears than actual spiders". Not all of us have the privilege of narrow little ear canals that...- $ 4.95
$ 4.95- $ 4.95
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Emergency Googly Eyes
Googly eyes make everything better! Archie McPhee's Emergency Googly Eyes come in a beautiful, eye-catching tin filled with twenty pairs of plastic eyes in four different sizes. Just expose their adhesive backs and start sticking them on stuff. A boring bagel becomes your carby...- $ 9.95
$ 9.95- $ 9.95
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Car Full of Cats Auto Sunshade
Holy Kitty Conveyance! It's The Catmobile If you could have one wish, wouldn’t it be that you could take your cats everywhere with you? This Car Full of Cats Auto Sunshade makes it look to outside observers that you’ve done just that. It’s...- $ 16.95
$ 29.95- $ 16.95
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Dancing Hula Girl Dashboard Bobble Doll
Good Vibes For Your Vehicle Nothing livens up your commute like a little Hula dancing! This adorable Dancing Hula Girl Dashboard Bobble Doll is a dashboard statement that'll make your morning commute feel like a refreshing island getaway... for a couple of minutes, anyway. Hey, we'll take...- $ 12.95
$ 19.95- $ 12.95
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Dashboard Jesus Bobble Head
Let The Dashboard Jesus Be Your Co Pilot The Dashboard Jesus Bobble Head is ready to be your copilot as you drive through the highways and byways of life. Just don't ask this Jesus to take the wheel, he is made of plastic and...- $ 10.95
$ 19.95- $ 10.95
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Emergency Replacement Sock
Soggy Shoes? Socks To Sock Let’s say you step in a puddle and it soaks right through your shoe. Are you just supposed to go all day with a frigid, damp sock on your foot? This Emergency Replacement Sock tin contains one (1)...- $ 6.95
$ 9.95- $ 6.95
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Bacon Gift Wrapping Paper
There Better Be Bacon In That Box This high quality Bacon Gift Wrapping Paper is completely covered with photos of greasy bacon strips. After all, everything is better when it's wrapped in bacon! Bacon Wrap That Makes Any Gift Delicious Featuring a photorealistic print...- $ 4.95
$ 9.95- $ 4.95
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Finger Cat Paw
Scratch Furniture, Bat At Cat Toys, Knock Thing Off The Counter As you slip these Finger Cat Paws on, you’ll find you have the urge to knock things off of shelves and sharpen your claws on the living room curtain. Cats use their paws...- $ 4.95
- $ 4.95
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Finger Crow
Counting Crows Crows are known for their love of small trinkets and shiny stuff, and in rare cases will trade with humans for food and coins. But if you can't get your local crows to do business with you, at least you can control...- $ 3.95
$ 6.95- $ 3.95
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Baby Raccoon Buddy
I Love You, Baby Trash Panda Baby raccoons are very cute, and it is legal to own a raccoon in 16 states, but they grow up to be adult raccoons. This stuffed latex Baby Raccoon Buddy is a better solution. It looks great in...- $ 25.95
$ 39.95- $ 25.95
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Finger Bat
They're Really Just Goth Birds Ever wanted to control a swarm of bats with a wave of your hand? Well, forget it. You could never hope to tame those beautiful, echo-locative creatures of the night. But these Finger Bats? You'll have 'em in the...- $ 4.95
$ 6.95- $ 4.95
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Finger Tentacle
Transform Your Fingers Into Wiggly, Wriggly Tentacles What kind of person wears Finger Tentacles? It's the kind of person who wants their hand to look like a squid. It's the kind of person who is pleased at the thought of slowly transforming into a...- $ 3.95
$ 6.95- $ 3.95
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Horse Head Squirrel Feeder
A Squirrel Of A Different Color You take Archie McPhee's Horse Head Mask, shrink it down and put a few nuts inside it, and get instant hilarity. This hanging vinyl Horse Head Squirrel Feeder makes it appear as if any squirrel that eats from it is wearing...- $ 18.95
$ 49.95- $ 18.95
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Finger Hand
This Item Is Really Really Handy Tiny hands for your fingers! Archie McPhee's Finger Hands make your fingers into tiny arms. You can always use a hand and you're always being asked to lend a hand, so it's probably a good idea to have...- $ 4.95
$ 6.95- $ 4.95
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Handimonster Cyclops Finger Puppet
Dr. Jekyll Or Mr. Hand? One second it’s just your plain old hand, the next second it’s a dang Handimonster! You can tell people that your hand was cursed by an angry Canadian fortune teller during a misinterpreted waving incident at the Gathering of...- $ 14.95
$ 14.95- $ 14.95
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Leech Bandages
Dr. Leech Will See You Now Why put a leech on these Leech Bandages? Actual doctors are using leeches again. Isn’t it shocking that using leeches in medicine has come back in vogue? Turns out a leech gets the blood flowing around wounds and restores...- $ 9.95
$ 13.95- $ 9.95
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Glow in the Dark Finger Tentacle
More Useful And Brighter Than Your Regular Fingers What kind of person wears Glow in the Dark Finger Tentacles? It's the kind of person who wants their hand to look like a squid. It's the kind of person who is pleased at the thought...- $ 5.95
$ 5.95- $ 5.95
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Handicorn Unicorn Finger Puppet
It Behooves Your Hand To, You Know, Be Hooves Look at your boring old hand! It's so practical with its opposable digit and prehensile-ness, but it lacks a certain... MAGIC! You need Handicorn Unicorn Finger Puppet! Handicorn will transform your former fist into the...- $ 8.95
$ 14.95- $ 8.95
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Inflatable Unicorn Horn for Cats
Cats Love It! Your cat pretends to be standoffish and cool, but slip this Inflatable Unicorn Horn for Cats on top of kitty's cranium and he'll reveal the fun-loving feline that you know he hides beneath his scowl. The horn uses a four-point elastic...- $ 7.95
- $ 7.95
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Meh Bandages
Instead Of Empathy, Get Some Meh-Pathy These Meh Bandages aren’t what you want for serious injuries. When the scratch isn’t too bad, you don’t have a medical emergency — you have a MEH-dical emergency. These fifteen large sterile strips, 3" x 1", decorated with the...- $ 9.95
$ 13.95- $ 9.95
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Hell Is Other People Socks
See You In Hell Two universal truths you discover once you reach adulthood: there is no more cruel and infernal punishment than having to be around other adults, and socks actually make a pretty good gift. Look, they've even got little flames on them! Grab...- $ 12.95
$ 12.95- $ 12.95
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Finger Unicorn
A Fairytale Told On Your Fingers Nothing makes your fingers more magical and whimsical than these Finger Unicorns! That's right, nothing. Not rings, not little tattoos, not even that nail polish that has a name like "unicorn tears" or "unicorn fantasy" and it's like,...- $ 2.95
$ 6.95- $ 2.95
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Finger Raccoon
Pest Friends Forever Who wouldn't wanna see these adorable Finger Raccoon Finger Puppets rummaging through their waste? Thankfully, these little guys require no food and are guaranteed rabies-free. But if you wanna make them bite, scratch and eat garbage anyway, who are we to...- $ 3.95
$ 5.95- $ 3.95
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Finger Possum
Packed With Possum Personality When you put on these Finger Possum Finger Puppets, it’s like your hand is a trash can full of delicious rotting food. This set of three 2" tall soft vinyl possum finger puppets will come to life on your fingers...- $ 3.95
$ 5.95- $ 3.95
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Gnome Squirrel Feeder
That Gnome Sure Goes Through A Lot Of Nuts Have you given up on trying to get rid of squirrels? Why not make them part of your garden decorations. This Gnome Squirrel Feeder will make them look just like living garden gnomes. Give Your...- $ 20.95
$ 39.95- $ 20.95
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Ketchup Candy
It's Not That Weird, Tomatoes Are Technically Fruit America’s favorite condiment in candy form! You love spreading ketchup all over your favorite foods, from fries to hot dogs, but we think the flavor of Archie McPhee's Ketchup Candy stands up on its own. These...- $ 6.95
$ 14.95- $ 6.95
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Yodeling Pickle
Disclaimer: Song May End On A Sour Note Take our word for it, Archie McPhee's Yodeling Pickle is the thing you need that you didn't know you need. Especially if you love pickles. Want to throw an unforgettable party? Yodeling Pickle. Had a bad day and...- $ 14.95
$ 24.95- $ 14.95
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Racing Roach Pull Toy Prank
3… 2… 1… SCATTER! Pull back on these Racing Roaches, release them, and they’ll tear off at top speed like someone just turned on a light. Hold cockroach races or scare a family member, these 3-1/2" (8.9 cm) soft vinyl and plastic insects are...- $ 9.95
- $ 9.95
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Vinderpants Wine Bottle Holder Underpants
No More Naked Bottles- Underpants For Your Wine That bottle of 1945 Chateau Mouton-Rothschild is pretty impressive, but it's shockingly naked. It needs Vinderpants Wine Bottle Holder Underpants! Archie McPhee's Vinderpants are 95% cotton, 5% spandex tighty-whities that fit snugly over most wine and...- $ 9.95
$ 9.95- $ 9.95
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Nose Pencil Sharpener
Nothing Says "Sharp" Like Putting Things In Your Nose Looks like somebody wanted to spite their face! This uniquely unsettling Nose Pencil Sharpener looks just like the real thing and will make sharpening your pencils an even more procrastinatory (and obscene) experience. Try doing it...- $ 7.95
$ 15.00- $ 7.95
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Super Genius Mints
Good For Mint-al Health Ok, honestly, we're not clear on whether Archie McPhee's Super Genius Mints are meant for those who are already gifted with intellect, or those who are in desperate need of it. But hey, everyone could use a mint once in...- $ 4.95
$ 7.95- $ 4.95
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Squirrel In Underpants Nodder
Makes Your Commute A Little Less Nuts Squirrel Underpants have been an important part of Archie McPhee for over a decade. Now, they're proudly presenting this Squirrel In Underpants Nodder of the rodent himself. If you’re tired of all those naked squirrels streaking across your yard and...- $ 11.95
$ 19.95- $ 11.95
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Racing Blobfish
Just Look At How Much Fun They're Having Why the long face? Don't worry, these Racing Blobfish are having a perfectly good time, their faces are just... long. Wind 'em up and watch 'em go! What are they racing for? Are they running late for...- $ 5.95
$ 9.95- $ 5.95
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Stress Werewolf
When The Moon Is Full, You'll Smell Strawberries There are a lot of drawbacks to being a werewolf, but the beastly transformation does release a lot of anxiety every full moon. Of course, even though Archie McPhee's Stress Werewolf's animal side is on full display,...- $ 14.95
$ 19.95- $ 14.95
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Grow A Girlfriend
Need a girlfriend? No problem! With Grow A Girlfriend, the possibilities are endless! Simply add water and watch as your new companion grows before your very eyes. Say goodbye to lonely nights and hello to a quirky, fun-filled relationship. (No more swiping right!)- $ 6.95
$ 9.95- $ 6.95
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Grow a Toy Boy
Get ready to have some fun and grow your very own Toy Boy! With this clever product, you can watch your Toy Boy grow from a tiny figurine to a full-sized toy. Perfect for anyone who enjoys a playful and quirky sense of humor....- $ 6.95
$ 6.95- $ 6.95
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Inflatable Instant Boob Job
Boost your confidence instantly with the Inflatable Instant Boob Job! Just inflate for a fuller chest in seconds. Perfect for special occasions or every day use. Say goodbye to push-up bras and hello to a natural, enhanced look. No more underwire discomfort or expensive...- $ 6.95
$ 6.95- $ 6.95
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Bitch Voodoo Doll
"Hex the haters with the Bitch Voodoo Doll in a fierce pink hue. This quirky doll lets you take back control and poke fun at the negativity surrounding you. Perfect for a sassy and confident queen (or king) looking to add some humor to...- $ 11.95
$ 11.95- $ 11.95
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Little Willy Condoms
"Pack a big surprise with Little Willy Condoms! Don't let insecurities get in the way of pleasure - these condoms are perfect for any size. With a playful name and reliable protection, you're sure to leave them wanting more. (No, seriously, it's little -...- $ 4.95
$ 4.95- $ 4.95
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After Sex Tissues
Clean up with ease after a naughty night. This novelty box comes with the perfect tissue to help you quickly clean up after all your wild adventures. Pick up a box for yourself or get one for a friend; either way you'll never find...- $ 7.95
$ 7.95- $ 7.95
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Ring for Sex Mini Bell
Need a little help initiating some frisky fun? This cheeky Ring for Sex Bell has got you covered! Just give it a ring, and watch your partner come running. With this playful accessory, you'll never have a dull moment in the bedroom. (Seriously, this...- $ 9.95
$ 9.95- $ 9.95
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RING FOR SEX DESK BELL
Need a little spice in the office? This Ring for Sex Desk Bell is the perfect addition to your desk. Simply give it a ring and watch your colleague's reactions! (Note: Use with discretion. Results may vary.- $ 10.95
$ 10.95- $ 10.95
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Rainbow Willy Warmer
"Keep your willy warm in style with our Rainbow Willy Warmer! This quirky accessory is one-size-fits-most and adds a pop of color to any outfit. Perfect for a fun and playful touch to any occasion. Don't let the cold weather bring you down -...- $ 9.95
$ 9.95- $ 9.95
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